Dear Birthmother and Birthfather,
We are a family of three humans and two pups and we live in Seattle, Washington. Our son, Mac, is the light of our lives. We want very much to welcome another child into our family. It is hard to give you a full picture of who we are – what we hope for in our lives, your lives, and the life of your baby – through a letter. We hope this will give you a glimpse into the warmth and happiness we share as a family. We would welcome the chance to talk with you and tell you more. In the meantime, thank you from the bottom of our hearts for giving us this chance, and for reading our letter.
With Love and Respect,
Nik, Lindsey & Mac
This is us
Love and Marriage
Lindsey: Nik and I have been together for fifteen years. When I was 22 years old, my aunt got married in Seattle (I lived in Iowa at the time). She mentioned that she worked with a nice guy who would also be coming to the wedding, and asked if I would consider letting him take me to a baseball game or out for dinner. I was so not interested in a blind date – but I agreed she could give him my email address.
Nik: For the record, I wasn’t interested either! But then I saw her picture and thought she was cute, and figured “why not?” I can still remember writing my first email to her. We sent each other hundreds of emails before we met in person, on April 19, 2002. When we saw each other for the first time, we both just knew.
Lindsey: The only problem was that I was starting law school in the Fall, and Nik had a job in Seattle, 2000 miles away. One of the things I love about Nik is that he is decisive and confident. He literally dropped everything – quit his job, sold his stuff – and moved to Iowa to be near me. He surprised me on the drive from Seattle to Iowa with a copy of every email we had sent to each other. Three years later, he proposed. We were married on the beach in Mexico, in front of fifty of our closest friends and family. It was magical.
Work and Fun
Lindsey: I am a construction law attorney. I really enjoy my job. It is demanding, but my work week is pretty reasonable. We live just five blocks from my office, so I don’t waste any time commuting, and I can always be home for dinner and bedtime.
Nik: I works for an office products and furniture company that Lindsey’s grandpa started in Seattle more than 60 years ago. I design office spaces and sell office furniture and manage large projects. My schedule is pretty flexible, and I work from home a few days a week.
Lindsey: I love doing crafts – sewing, building furniture, canning garden vegetables, creating presents for friends – you name it.
Nik: I like being outside, puttering on the patio, playing soccer and baseball with Mac, and golfing when the weather is nice. We both like to cook.
We live in the heart of historic Seattle, and we love our life in the City. We are big sports fans, and we go to lots of Seahawks games, Sounders (soccer) games, and Mariners games. There is a great park just a block away from our condo with foosball tables and giant Legos and frequent live music. We play there a few times a week. We enjoy trying new restaurants, seeing concerts, and going to the nearby beach. Mac takes soccer lessons and swim lessons, and is very proud to have “earned” a bright red scooter after a great report from preschool.
We have a family cabin on an island just two hours from our house, and we often go on the weekends to relax, let the dogs run on the beach, and listen to the sound of the waves from the deck. We enjoy traveling, and we take a trip to Mexico every January with family and friends.
Nik: I grew up on a pear orchard in a small town in Washington, with my parents, my older brother, Marc, and my sister Sarah. My parents met as teenagers at the drinking fountain of the local drive-in movie theater. I played soccer, golf, baseball and basketball growing up – but basketball was our family sport. Of all the guys in our family, I am the second shortest – my Dad is 6’5″. He had me out shooting hoops as soon as I could walk.
Growing up, our house was always full of people my family was helping in one way or another. We sponsored a family from the Ukraine that needed to escape religious persecution in Russia, and a family fleeing the war in Haiti. We welcomed foster kids, migrant workers, and many people that needed a lift and a loving home. My parents adopted my youngest sister, Monique, when she was seven. My parents taught me how important it is to help others, that you can change lives for the better, and that your family can be a mixture of people, related or not.
Lindsey: My childhood was happy, and full of experiences. I did ballet, played soccer, and had a large group of friends. I am incredibly close to my parents. My mom and I spent hours at the library picking out books, working on craft projects and eating popcorn while we watched movies in bed. We always ate dinner as a family and we took great family trips. Our families absolutely adore Mac. His grandmas and cousins cannot get enough of him. We see our families often and love spending time with them.
We always knew that we wanted to be parents, when the time was right. We thought we would try having biological children, but also grow our family through adoption. We started trying to have a baby after we had been married about six years, but we did not naturally conceive. We tried some minimally invasive fertility procedures, but they just didn’t feel “right” to us. We realized that our path to parenthood would be through adoption.
We finished all of our adoption paperwork for our first adoption in September of 2014. Just two months later, we were contacted about Mac’s birth mom. We sent her a letter like this one, and then met her in person. To our great joy, she chose us as Mac’s adoptive parents. We kept in close contact during the remaining months of her pregnancy via text message and emails. She invited us to be at the hospital when Mac was born.
We have remained in contact with Mac’s birth mom, and we consider her a dear member of our family. We exchange texts and emails every couple of months, and we have been able to see her twice (she lives in a different state) since Mac was born. We talk openly with Mac about her, and we include her in our family photo albums. We treasure having her in our lives, and we hope to have the same loving relationship with the birth parents of our next child, if we are fortunate enough to adopt again.
We talk a lot about our roles as parents, and what is important to us. We value honesty and hard work, creativity and kindness. While we don’t actively practice a religion, we do value spirituality, a sense of self, and the importance of being a good person to others and contributing to the world we live in.
It is important to us to encourage and support Mac in developing into the person he is meant to be – whether that is a musician, a librarian, a mechanic, a bookworm, an athlete – or any number of other endeavors. With each passing month we see more of who he is and who he will be – it is such a privilege to be a part of it.
It is also important to us that Mac have a brother or sister (or both!). Lindsey was an only child, and now, as an adult, really wishes she had siblings. Nik is very, very close to his siblings – they are an integral part of our lives. We want Mac to have that support system as well. And, we are so enjoying this ride as parents, we want to do it all over again.
Thank you for letting us share a little bit of our life with you. Please know that we respect and admire you for considering adoption. We wish you the very best on this journey.
If you would like more information about our family, or to set up a time to talk on the phone, we would be so pleased. Please call Cindy (anytime) at A Loving Alternative, 1-800-556-5635, and she will put us in touch.